Wednesday, January 11, 2012

Don't Carpe Diem!

A friend of mine posted a link to this fabulous blog on facebook this morning and I just had to share it here.  This momma blogger so eloquently sums up how I feel many days and I have a feeling I will come back to her post in the future when I need a little reminder.  I will admit to feeling like a "double failure" of a mom when I'm stressed, frustrated, tired and just wishing that the day/week/month would end and we could move onto a different phase.  The mom guilt would consume me if I wasn't enjoying every.single.moment.  And being reminded how fast they grow up didn't make me feel better either.  But she reminds us that we don't have to.  No one enjoys every single moment of their life....whether that's being a mom, going to work every day, or climbing Everest.  Just because we don't Carpe Diem doesn't mean we are doing something wrong.  It doesn't mean I don't love being a mom, but I can totally relate to that fabulous feeling of settling onto the couch with Bryan, a glass of wine, and some quality TV (anyone watching The Bachelor this season...such a train wreck!) after Nolan goes to bed.

And I totally agree with her description of Kairos time.  It seems like God has a way of working in those special moments at exactly the right time.  And that makes all the tough times worth it! 

Hope you enjoy her post as much as I do!

Saturday, December 31, 2011

Happy New Year!!

Bryan and I are officially the lamest people this New Year's eve!  (although we've never been big NYE fans...get dressed up to pay $$$ to go to an over-crowded bar and then fight for a cab back home.  No thank you!)  But this year is lamer than ever....and I'm not ashamed of it one bit!  Nolan and I went for a run, we met some friends for an early dinner, and now we are relaxing on the couch while the little guy sleeps.  I have no plans to be awake at midnight and that's just fine by me!

I hope that whatever you are doing tonight, you have a happy and healthy New Year!! 

Bottoms up everyone!

Thursday, December 29, 2011

"Wait until he's 6 months..."

When Nolan was 2 months old, I was talking to a friend at a wedding who has a 2 year old and another one the same age as Nolan.  She said something to me that I distinctly remember.

"Just wait until he is 6 months will fall so much more in love with him."  

I remember thinking that I couldn't possibly love him more than I currently did...but she was right.  For us, it happened closer to 5 months and has just continued from there.  Don't get me wrong, I have ALWAYS loved my son but over the past two months I've often found myself getting teary eyed not from frustration or lack of sleep, but from the overwhelming amount of love I have for him.  Yes, this is when we sleep trained him so that cut a lot of the stress I was feeling down so I was less sleep deprived making me able to enjoy life more.  But its also when he started interacting more and he became so much fun!  Now instead of smiling just for the heck of it, he smiles when he sees my face.  Instead of aimlessly batting for a toy, he actually plays with things (his favorites activities include ripping the pages out of magazines and watching his stuffed animals fall off the book shelf).  Instead of just lying on the floor, he crawls (yes, he started crawling at 6 months and 1 week!) to give me a hug or to meet Bryan at the back door after work.  He melts my heart on a daily basis.

Everyone always says the first 6 weeks are the toughest with a baby.  I think we were lucky that Nolan wasn't too difficult at the beginning.  For us, months 3 and 4 were the hardest.  I often questioned whether I was cut out to be a stay at home mom.  Heck, I questioned whether I was even cut out to be a mom at all!  I had feelings of "why did we do this??" and "what were we thinking having a baby?!?" which of course made me feel guilty and even worse than I already felt.  But the past two months, I can not imagine my life any different.  I am truly blessed that Bryan's career allows me to stay at home with Nolan because I couldn't imagine missing a single smile on his little face.  We still have our rough days (and nights) where he's overly fussy, clingly, and won't nap (like right now when his 4th...yes 4th!! tooth is trying to break through), but I am better able to handle them because they are the exception, not the norm from a few months ago.

Everyone also says that things, good and bad, are just a phase and will change soon.  While you know that to be true, when you're in the midst of a bad phase you feel like it will never end.  I couldn't see the light at the end of the tunnel because no one could tell me how long that tunnel was.  Those two months were like being on a treadmill that never stops, each step making you more and more exhausted.  I dreaded the days because nap time was such a struggle and I dreaded the nights because I never knew if I'd get to sleep for 1 hour or 4 hours before Nolan woke up.  Dr. Ferber and Dr. Weissbluth were my sleep training saviors.  These two men deserve a blog post of their own because they are that brilliant!

I had been meaning to write this post for some time as my friend's comment kept popping into my head.  Now that Nolan is one day away from being 7 months old, I can only imagine that my love for him is going to continue to grow each and every day.

Sunday, December 25, 2011

From our family to yours

Wishing you all a very Merry Christmas!!

Sarah, Bryan, and Nolan

Wednesday, December 14, 2011

Its never to late to be thankful!

While we typically think of Thanksgiving as the day to be thankful, since I'm a few weeks late with this blog post, I figure today is just as good to be thankful!  This year, my family decided to head down to Bend, OR a cute resort town where Mt. Bachelor is located.  While it was a little different than our Thanksgiving last year that we spent in Zion (Nolan was 13 weeks old in my belly then), we had a fun time hiking around, relaxing, and spending family time together.

What I'm most thankful for!

 First hike in his big boy backpack!

Hiking is hard work!

My little bear in the snow

Bend was great and we are hoping to get back down there this winter to do some skiing at Bachelor.  For the end of November, the mountain looked like it was doing pretty well and there were already lots of skiers out enjoying the snow.

We also learned a lot about traveling with a baby at this age that will affect some of our plans for the next couple months.  He's definitely not as portable as he was a few months ago!  While we don't plan on putting our lives on hold, we are rethinking some trips we were planning.  His sleep (and ours!) is just too important right now and we found its the first thing to go when you travel at this age.  Luckily we are all back on track and sleeping well...until our next trip on Friday.

Wednesday, December 7, 2011

Blog Abandonment

I apologize for my lack of blogging the past 2 weeks.  If you've been following my blog for a while, you'll know that I go through phases of blog abandonment.  But I always come back!

This most recent break can only be blamed on one thing.  No, not a lack of sleep or being too busy.  I blame it on The Hunger Games.  I recently decided to pick up my much neglected Kindle (funny I haven't touched it in 6 months!) and read a non-baby book.  I was searching Amazon for a book to read and saw The Hunger Games.  I had no idea what it was about but I knew I had heard good things about it.  Let's just say that I was hooked from page one.  Luckily the three book series is a fast read because I was using as many of Nolan's nap times to read as I could get away with and not let my house completely fall apart!

Last night I finished book three and I'll admit I was slightly disappointed with it, but I always do this with books I love....the ending just never seems good enough for me.  Now that I'm done, I promise to make a blog return because I have lots to talk about.  Our Thanksgiving trip, Nolan's first tooth, 6 month old stats...the list goes on!

See you soon :)

Tuesday, November 15, 2011

November 15, 2010

Dear Nolan,

One year and 3 days ago, you had been growing in mommy's belly for about 11 weeks.  Only a few people knew about you, but Mommy and Daddy were so excited to begin to tell people about you soon.  We were especially excited to tell your great grandparents because they had been waiting (and asking!) when we would have a baby for quite some time.

One year and three days ago all that changed.  This is the day that mommy found out that your Great Grandma P (GGP) had a stroke and was in the hospital.  We prayed that she would get better but one year ago today God decided it was time for her to come be with him.  Although Mommy never did get to tell GGP about you, Grandpa was able to sit down with her before she died and told her that you were coming.  We all think that she understood him and fought a little harder to get better so that she'd get a chance to meet you.

I'm writing this to you today so that you can get to know your GGP and your Great Grandpa P through stories about them.  Your GGPs were so loving and special to your mommy and the rest of your family.  You would have been their first great grandson and they would have been so proud of you.  You would have been part of the new big-four and they would have taken you on surprise trips to the Please Touch Museum and The Franklin Institute after camping in the dining room.  They would have made you pancakes on Saturday mornings and given you quarters to put in the offering plate on Sunday mornings.  They would have made sure the jar on the coffee table was always filled with peanut M&Ms and both GGP and mommy would teach you the proper order to eat those M&Ms (I learned later in life that your GGP and I shared a need to put our candy in order...I wonder if you inherited that bizarre trait from us?).  But most of all, they would have loved you more than any GGPs could ever love their grandson.  I have no doubt that GGP had a big smile on the inside when your grandpa told her about you and that her and Great Grandpa P smile down from heaven every day at you.

I will do my best to tell you lots of stories about them over the years so that you can get to know what wonderful people they were.  For now, I'll continue to sing Teddy Bear's Picnic to you every night while we get ready for bed and think of your GGP each and every time.

Love you,

*On a side note, I need to stop taking trips to states that I will move to in the future!  My grandpa died while I was in Utah and we moved there two years later.  My grandma died while we were in Oregon for Bryan's job interview.  No more moving...I only have two grandparents left :)